23 weeks...or 24....?

How far along? Well i'm 24 weeks today, but so much has been going on that I missed my 22 and 23 week posts. BLAHH...moving (and not moving), and caring for an infant and her unborn sibling REALLY take up a lot of time. So sorry to her sister, who will probably be deeply offended that some of her posts are missing ;) Mom tried....really, I did. 

If you'd like to go back to when I had OODLES of time, and read about my 22nd week with Elsie, click right here! 23rd week?...click right here! and lets just add the 24th week for good measure! You can find it HERE! Uff da! 

Maternity clothes: Still on the same routine as far as that goes. 

Stretch marks? Nada. My belly is still pretty small. Some days it still barely looks like i'm even pregnant, which is actually sort of a bummer to me. (Sometimes lol) I had a doctor's appointment last week and I've only gained about 3 lbs so far. They aren't very concerned, especially considering I only gained about 15-17 lbs with Elsie and she was an almost 8 lb baby. Also considering the baby is right on track with growth, she's actually measuring AHEAD. I'm definitely not restricting myself as far as my diet goes, so it's a mystery to me why i'm not gaining weight. They are going to start monitoring my weight gain a little closer from here on out. 

Sleep: No problem! 

Best moment this week: Week? Don't you mean closer to MONTH? gulp. Let's see..I guess getting the official word from my ultrasound that she's a perfect little healthy babe! That's always such a weight off my mind. So grateful and blessed to have another healthy baby a'brewin. Also we've had a couple field trips as a family now that the days are getting warmer. LOVING that.  

Miss anything?: Meh, i'm good. 

Movement: Yep! She's a little wiggle worm! But she doesn't seem to wake me up at all through the night. (fingers crossed that will remain the case AFTER she's born! hehe) 

Food cravings: Lots of ice cream has been on my mind lately. Also I had a DEEP craving for brownies/cake with chocolate frosting. I got all the supplies, but my dear husband had already packed up our pans. I still haven't had that brownie. Tragic. 

Anything making you queasy or sick?  Nothing!! Funny story though, literally within hours of me saying that on my last post, I threw up. So i'll tread lightly on that one.   

Gender: Chickadee 

Labor signs: Nope, lots of braxton hicks though!! 

Symptoms: Indigestion like a mofo!! braxton hicks, general achiness especially my hips 

Belly button in or out? Still rockin and rolling. 

Happy or moody most of the time? Meh, the process of buying a home is for the birds. It's had me down lately. Also packing is legit my most hated thing. Literally #1. So annoying.

Looking forward to: I'd like to say moving...but who knows when that will ever be. I'll just say steady warm weather. lol. This up and down crap ain't cool. 

16 weeks!

How far along? I'm 16 weeks! 

Maternity clothes: I went shopping at my favorite thrift store and got a nice little starter set of maternity clothes, it's still not COMPLETELY necessary yet but i'm definitely getting there. Better to be prepared! ;) 

Stretch marks? Still holdin up! 

Sleep: Sleeping okay, not so much this week but in general sleeping well. 

Best moment this week: I don't really know to be honest because I had an absolutely AWFUL week. Starting Monday I came down with a horrific migraine which then migrated into an awful awful sickness of some kind. I had a low fever, headache, chills, and absolute non stop vomiting. On Wednesday I started to feel improved as far as the "bug" went but they think I was so badly dehydrated and starving that It just started re-triggering baby nausea all over again and my body just couldn't catch up. So Wednesday evening after not eating or drinking anything since Monday it was decided that I needed to head to the ER to get IV fluids.  She pumped me full of fluids and nausea medication and I felt SO much better. I have felt good ever since so lets hope and pray something like that NEVER happens to me again. I feel like I could cry just thinking about it. Miserable. So I guess I could say my best moment was when I didn't feel that way anymore! 

Miss anything?: Can't think of anything at the moment! 

Movement: It's really hard to say! Every so often I feel a little gas bubble type sensation that maybe COULD be the flutters? But i'm really not sure obviously cause I have nothing to compare it to. Could just be actual gas LOL. 

Food cravings: I haven't really eaten enough this week to even KNOW what i've been craving lol. 

Anything making you queasy or sick? This is becoming a bit redundant but again,considering most of the week EVERYTHING made me sick, it's hard to say. 

Gender: 2 weeks until we (hopefully) find out!! AHHH I can't wait! 

Labor signs: Nope 

Symptoms: achey head, that can stop any time and that'd be alright with me!   

Belly button in or out? Still in

Wedding rings on or off? On.

Happy or moody most of the time? This week i've been BLAH. 

Looking forward to: I'll give you one guess!!!! C'mon April 7th!!! 

Jaded

It's hard for me to put into words the way I'm feeling today. I feel disheveled and unsure. I don't really know what i'm doing anymore, or what I should do. I want to pick apart my brain. So i'm just going to start rattling off every damn thought that comes into my brain. There is something genuinely disturbing about how painfully indecisive and unsure I am about nearly every decision I am faced with. I sincerely wish I was doing something with my life that I loved. And i'm just not. Sure, I can tolerate my job..I enjoy the company of the people I work with, and I have great bosses. But is this really what I see myself doing for the rest of my life??? Is this my destiny? And if it's not, what the hell am i doing?? How do I find something to do that I genuinely love.What steps do i take?? I don't want to just start going to school 100 different times to test things out. It just sucks because the whole motto around the town is "Just be thankful you have a job." I AM thankful to have a job. I'm thankful to be making money. But i'm BORED, and I wake up every morning with a general feeling of "UGHHHH"  I ache to just get home and be with Josh, cause that's really my only source of genuine happiness! And it shouldn't be that way!! Should it??? Is this just the way it's going to be? We're all just little robots that march around and do non fulfilling jobs just for the sake of money. Granted, I know I need to make money, It is an absolute necessary evil-i'm WELL aware. But is it so much to ask to feel a sense of happiness and enthusiasm, OR maybe even some form of desire to go to work? Or is that just some kind of fantasy land I have brewing in my mind. Maybe It is. I just feel really out of sorts about the whole thing. I just wish there was a clear cut answer to it all. Maybe I wouldn't be so depressed. Now absolutely don't get me wrong, I know i'm probably making it seem overly dramatic, and like i'm employed in some kind of hell hole. That's NOT IT AT ALL,I don't have any truly awful things to even say about it..but i don't feel any sense of accomplishment or worth. My life is just so blahhh. OVERLY standard, and I can't stand it. But how do I change it? What do i do, what steps do i take? I know everyone says this, but can't I just win the lottery or even just some kind of jackpot. I'm not picky. Idk, I just feel like at the rate i'm going, i'll look back on my life with a lot of regret. And not as a whole, because I have an amazing and supportive husband and family, and not everyone is blessed with that. It's just where i'm at personally. Very lacking. And I know whatever change I wanted to make, Josh would be behind me 100% every step of the way, but I just don't know where to start! Blah dee blah...I know i'm just talking to myself. I need HELP!!!!!